Why "Our" Story

Well, these days "my" story doesn't exist without Yeshua (Jesus) being the lead... so it's "our" story. Even at the risk of sounding cheesy. I am NOT religious! I adore Yeshua and our relationship and all He has done for me.... so this blog is all about that!  

Please note: this site is free... so if there are ads... I can't control them. 


About me...

Aiden, Summer & Johnny

I am a mother of two amazing boys. I love them and the Lord with all my heart, and it is my goal in life to bring Him glory in all that I do. I am not perfect, nor do I pretend to be. I am not religious, but have a relationship. 

In the words of June Carter Cash,

"I'm just trying to matter". ❤

After losing many loved ones to suicide, including my childhood friend and boyfriend (2002), and my husband and sons father (2015) I knew in my spirit it was time for me to do something. Out of deep grief, the Lord restored my soul and birthed in me a ministry. 

Far More Productions


A Special Shout Out to me Mum

Melissa Moody (my closest friend)

I most definitely wouldn’t know Jesus if it weren’t for my mother. She has taught me hard work and perseverance against all odds. She connected me to the Holy Spirit, and for that I am eternally grateful. I can say with absolute certainty that I would not be who I am today if it were not for her. She has been there through every bit of life with me, and is continually always there for me with an encouraging word and lifts me up every time I fall! Thank you, Momma. For everything! You are the first divine connection God made in my life. Assigning me to you! 


Shout out to my Pops

Daddy, I am grateful for you. You not only taught me how to hike and camp, but you taught me how to take care of myself. You took me to buy my very first pair of hiking boots, and gave me my love for singing and all music (the good kind). Some of my favorite memories growing up were singing around the campfire with you and your friends, and taking a two week camping extravaganza with just you me and Brooke. I have so many wonderful memories with you!! I am really looking forward to being able to run up Pinnacle Mountain with you (maybe even beating you... one day... you never know!). I don't know how many times people have come up to me over the years and told me about all of the wonderful things you told them about me. That speaks volumes to me!!! You stood up for me when the men in my life were treating me wrong, and I know that you will always have my back. For everthing I am forever grateful. Thank you for loving me and my boys unconditionally. 


From the beginning ... well sort of

JOURNAL

I have felt for a long time that I needed to journal my experiences with the Lord, but have yet to take the time. Then in an amazing book, ‘Visioneering’ by Andy Stanley, I was told that it was imperative to do so… so here I go!

FIRST TIME HEARING FROM GOD

The first time I can remember having a serious “hearing from God” moment was when I was a senior and was in the process of planning my “life after high school.”  When I was in middle school my mother had gone to a women’s retreat out in the woods of Hot Springs, AR, and learned about Brookhill Ranch Summer Camp. I attended the camp when I was in 7th grade and learned about their two-year college program, Applied Life Christian College. My mother had also learned of this college program when she attended the women’s retreat, and I’m sure had already begun praying for me to attend while I was still in middle school.

So back to my senior year of high school, praying and planning. I had the rare opportunity to attend the William Esper Studios (prestigious and hard to get into acting program in New York City), and was accepted via a phone interview with the William Esper himself after telling me how impressed he was with the letter I submitted. Needless to say (but I’ll say it anyway) I was on cloud nine. To fill you in, I was in LOVE with acting (and all things cinema) and of course New York City.  Since I was 8 years old my heart beat for New York City, and for acting.  So, as a 16 year old having to choose between the loves of my life (acting and NYC), and some tiny school in the woods that had nothing to do with acting… seemed like the choice was pretty clear.

However, something inside of me felt that there was an actual argument to be made for this tiny school in the woods. So I prayed… “Fine Lord, if You want me to go to this school … in the woods… then you will have to make it writing in the clouds clear to me. Like so clear I can’t deny it was You. Otherwise… I’m leaving for NYC as soon as I can!”

Then Benny Hinn comes to Little Rock. If I remember correctly my aunt was super into him at the time and probably forced my cousin and I to go. I may have wanted to go, but I honestly can’t remember. So we are there and I am pretty sure I called my mom or someone to come get me out of there. Then he calls all the youths to come down to the floor of the arena. I felt a burning in my chest like I was going to miss something if I didn’t go down. So I did. I’m down there packed in with thousands of other “youths” and this girl ( I didn’t know) in front of me turned around (out of thousands) and says to me “ I feel the Lord telling me to tell you that you are supposed to go to Applied Life Christian College in Hot Springs, AR. That’s where I go to school right now, and I feel that He is telling me you are supposed to come there as well.” 

Are you kidding me? Seriously God? So I start balling, and she hugs me. Did I mention that I didn’t know her? Yet here I am sobbing in her arms for the longest few minutes of my life. Clearly, I couldn’t deny that. So I went to Applied Life Christian College (ALCC), this tiny little school in the woods. Which leads me to my first actual conversation with Jesus by myself. 


FIRST CONVERSATION WITH YESHUA (JESUS)

On my 18th birthday, September 13th, 2002, I am at the first campout with ALCC. Out in the woods with the other students in my two-year program and a few leaders & teachers. It was pretty cool. The biggest part I can remember was when I went out to the woods by myself and started talking to Jesus. And the craziest thing… I got a response. First time. I was like “Woah. Is that You”?

It wasn’t an audible voice (I probably would have run back to camp screaming… I wasn’t ready for all that), but it was clear in my spirit it wasn’t me responding to myself. At this moment, I can’t remember exactly the conversation, but I know He was basically giving me the direction I was asking for. It was definitely not what I wanted to hear, but most certainly what I needed to do. I remember that much. 


FIRST DEEP LOSS TO SUICIDE

Thomas Tansil Dillaha

  Thomas Tansil Dillaha. My childhood friend who had become my boyfriend the summer after I graduated high school. We were inseparable. Undeniably strongly connected. We needed each other. He needed me, and I needed how much he needed me. He struggled with deep, dark anxiety. It appeared I was his source of peace. I loved that. I see now how that was unhealthy, but at 17 I lived for how he lived for me. I could help him. I could fix his problems. I could be there for him like no one else could. I did not take joy in his pain, I found joy in being able to heal his pain.

Clearly, I wasn’t healing anything. Only making it worse. That fall I made it even worse. I left for ALCC in September of 2002. We drove back and forth from Little Rock to see each other quite a few days a week. Which was not good for my focus on school or God. Finally, a few of my teachers pulled me aside to discuss this lack of focus. I explained to them my relationship with Thomas. They showed me how unhealthy it was and that I needed to pray about what to do.

I was not mature enough in my walk with the Lord to hear Him properly, but regardless I had decided that the only way I could focus on God and school was to end my relationship with Thomas. Well, I was 18 at this point… so… I did it over the phone like an inconsiderate, coward, idiot. I didn’t actually want to end it with him. I knew that if I did it in person I’d crumble. That’s not an excuse. That was my weak, teenage justification.

This took place in October of 2002. When I was home for Thanksgiving he called me. I didn’t answer. I thought I was being strong. Then when I was home for Christmas, on December 14th he called me. Frantic, “Summer, this is Thomas. Call me now”. That wasn’t like him. He was soft, and sweet, not demanding and stern. But again, I thought I was being strong.

Three days later I get another call. Only this one was from his sister. “I just thought you should know that Thomas killed himself today.”  It felt like my heart stopped. Please, no. No. No. It was all my fault, I thought. How self-centered right… to think I had that much power over someone’s life. I was sure everyone thought it was my fault. Regardless of anything else that could have been going on in his life, I wasn’t there for him when he needed me most. I let him down. I failed him. All that time I was being “strong” I was just hiding. Being a coward.

That was my thought process. My mother panicked. Terrified I might be so distraught as to follow in his footsteps she called my lead pastor. He spoke to me on the phone for a while that night. I will never forget that. I don’t recall everything that he said, but I am sure it was meant to be encouraging. I’m also sure most of it went in one ear and out the other, but still to this day the gesture meant the world to me.

Then she called my best friend from high school, Kelly and my friend from ALCC, we’ll call him ‘Jay’ (to preserve his anonymity), and asked them to come over. We probably stayed up most of the night talking on the back deck of my parent’s house. I doubt I did much talking, but it was probably best that I wasn’t alone.

Losing Thomas to suicide, not just death, but choosing death… was life altering for me. I am sure much more for his family. I do not ever want anything I say or do to be taken as though I want attention for it, or enjoy the aftermath. That is not the case. The truth is he was important to me and from that point on I believed I didn’t deserve to be happy with anyone else because of what I did to him. How I deserted him in his time of need. Not that I could tell the future or could have known what was coming, but still. I held myself accountable. For many, many years to come.

I know this part is sad, and not much encouragement in it, but that will come later. This information is needed to understand the calling God has placed on my life!


THE FIRST MARRIAGE

            Remember the friend I called ‘Jay’ from ALCC, from the previous entry? He eventually became my boyfriend. December 13th, 2002. How do I remember that date so well? Well, that was the very last day of first semester at ALCC. The rule was you couldn’t date your first semester. So the moment the semester was over… Jay asked me to be his girlfriend. So of course, I said yes. Most of my life I believed that if a boy was attracted to me and I was attracted to him… it was meant to be. Well, in this case we were in the same Christian College… match made in heaven, right? Yeah, not so much. But that didn’t keep me from marrying him and having his child. Rebellious much? Details of our story are not needed for this specific journal, so I’ll keep it to a minimum. Long story short, we were married in April 2005, Aiden Julius was born November 2005, we separated in 2006, and were divorced by June 2007. I felt like a complete failure. Yet again.

            I ran and hid from my church family in shame and guilt. Hid out at work and home. Spent all my time with my sweet baby Aiden. Basically, getting further and further from God. Even though I would still pray every night… “God, forgive me. Please keep up safe. I love you. I’m sorry.” That was about it. Sometimes I would drive back to Hot Springs to visit my church, Christian Ministries Church (affiliated with ALCC) and sit in the back with Aiden. A part of me knew it was where I was meant to be, but I listened to my shame instead. 


JOHN ALLEN LYNCH JR.– RETURNS

John Allen Lynch Jr.

            So, I’m living the single mom life. Not much communication with Aiden’s father, if any. Work and home. Just me and Aiden. Then I get a phone call from Mr. John Allen Lynch Jr. I thought it was meant to be. We had gone our separate ways and ended up back in each other’s lives. Besides, I totally had a crush on him when I was younger… and now he wants to see me!!! Day… made!

            We start dating November 2007. I immediately met his ex-wife and two children. Loved them. I think by the next spring break I was in Plymouth, Mass. meeting his family. I completely fell in love with them. Especially when I saw his dad with his wife. I knew then that I wanted to marry John Allen, and be a part of that family forever. They welcomed my Aiden like he was already a part of their family. They made us feel at home!

            I adored John Allen Lynch Jr. We eventually were married in August of 2010, and had our baby boy, John Allen Lynch III in June of 2011. Our story is filled with ups and downs. We both made mistakes. Unfortunately, big enough to end our marriage by December of 2011. Secretly I hoped he’d fight for me. He did the best he could, but he was fighting demons of his own that I couldn’t fight for him. Even though I tried and wanted to. I was a mess myself. A total hot mess. Walking around in a fog of confusion and wallowing in a deep dark hole of self-pity and depression. We went back and forth for over a year.

The Four All Growd Up

Our Blended Family


TWO FAILED MARRIAGES

            Here I am. Two divorces. Two boys. Two baby daddies. Like I said… a hot mess. I want to make it clear that I take full responsibility for my part in the failure of these relationships. There is no need for me to give a list of anyone’s short comings or mistakes that hurt me, because then I’d have to give a list of my short comings and how I hurt them.

            I was in no position to marry anyone or have babies. I should have focused more on the Lord and sought Him for each decision I was to make. However, we can only play the shoulda, coulda, woulda game for so long. It doesn’t help anyone or anything. So, I will not be doing that any longer.

 

            “And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.” (Romans 8:28) I know that I love Him, and I knew from when I was a teenager that He called me according to His purpose… so my blessings even after being totally rebellious and defiant… Aiden Julius and John Allen Lynch III (Johnny). 


“MOVE TO HOT SPRINGS” He says...

            We come to March of 2012. I am living at my parent’s house… again. With two kids. I need Jesus right now. My mom agrees to keep my boys and lets me go to one of those women’s retreats in Hot Springs. I am standing outside of the pavilion at the retreat, as I’m looking over the gorgeousness they call vespers, I felt the Lord say “You need to move here”. I totally thought that was just me, because I felt the most peace here.

I said, “Lord, if that is You please confirm it and make it so clear that I can’t deny it was You. You’ve done it before… please do it this time”.  Later on, I walked back into the pavilion and within maybe an hour I had three people say to me… “If you lived here…”, “You should move here…”, “Can’t you see Aiden coming to our school here?”

I was thinking “Okay, Lord. I hear You.”. It was the “Can’t you see Aiden coming to our school here?” that pushed me over the edge. Not too long before that I had been crying in my bathroom in the middle of the night over where to send Aiden to school for first grade. He was about to be done with Kindergarten and I couldn’t really afford the place he was currently attending.

When he was a month old, Aiden was diagnosed with Urticaria Pigmentosa and Mastocytosis. In English… he had hives all over his body and a rare disorder of mast cells in his skin. Which means he had spots. All over. The kids he was currently going to school with were used to it, but if he were to go to a new school with new people they could possibly make fun of him. I had learned of so many young kids taking their lives because of bullying, and I was terrified to put Aiden in that situation.

Well the school in Hot Springs was Christian Ministries Academy… attached to the church I already felt was home. It was so small that I could get to know all the other children’s moms and approach them if any of their kids bullied my kid. However, that wasn’t necessary. Plus I had a close enough relationship with the principal and his wife that if I really needed to reach out to them I would feel comfortable doing so.

“Okay, Lord. If You really want me to move to Hot Springs from Little Rock I need You to provide financially. I need a place to live close to school, smaller car, day care for  Johnny, someone to help me with the kids before and after school since I still will work in Little Rock (an hour drive morning and evening), and money for all of this!”

This was in March. I knew I heard Him so I moved forward in planning. I spoke to CMA’s principal to get Aiden enrolled in 1st grade for the coming fall. I told my family I was moving to the country while I still worked in Little Rock. I looked into places to live. All summer I worked toward moving to Hot Springs in the fall. It was a couple of weeks before Aiden was supposed to start 1st grade and I still needed a place to live (for $450 a month for three of us), day care, and a nanny ( I worked a lot). Oh, and the money to make it all happen.

It is 1 week before school starts and God connects me to the Erwin’s. Talk about divine connections in a one-stop-shop! The parent Erwin’s provided us with a place to live on their protected and safe property for almost $100 less a month than they had planned (to fit my budget), their oldest daughter provided me a full-time day care (actually Pre-school) for $250 less a month than I was already paying (30 seconds from our home), and their youngest daughter signed on to be our nanny for after school and when I had events! All in the same 1 hour visit to the Erwin’s home.

I mean… is that God or what? Oh, on top of all of that, He provided the funds to make all of this happen the WEEK before Aiden started 1st grade. Clearly, He wanted us to move to Hot Springs. It is the first time in my life that I have known I am right where I am supposed to be. I have a home church (Christian Ministries Church) and church family that I can call on any time I need, a school for my kids (Christian Ministries Academy) that is unlike any other I’ve ever come across and amazingly affordable, and irreplaceable mentors that equip and empower me on a regular basis.


THE NEXT PHASE OF HOT SPRINGS

Kern's first tenant!

One mentor that has been around the longest (other than my mother of course) is Pastor Paul Kern… the boys and I just call him ‘Kern’ (I started calling him Kern when I was 18 and it stuck). Kern was definitely placed in my like by God Himself. No doubt about it. Even through all of my stupidity, sin, drama, and mistakes he has always be genuinely there for me. Unconditionally. I’m sure he had his moments of “That girl! When is she going to learn?”. But he never gave up on me. He never washed his hands of me and my drama. He never cut me out of his life.

He was always there to encourage, rebuke, empower or whatever the Lord led him to do for me in that moment. I am eternally grateful for that man in my life. Now he is there for my boys. They adore him. They always want to say hi to him and run to him whenever they see him. They want a hug. It’s priceless for me.

Well, over the past 10 years the Lord had birthed a desire in Kern’s heart to build and run a set of apartments on this land he owned by the church. Once he had them built and I saw them and how close they were to the school/church I wanted in. I had been at the Erwin’s property for around 3 years and it was time. I prayed about it to make sure it was alright with the Lord.

I know how that sounds, but I went way too long making so many decisions that weren’t okay with Him and my life was in shambles. So, asking Him about what steps to take (especially as big as moving my family) makes total sense now. I have learned the hard way that when I listen to Him, seek His guidance, and then actually obey… I am blessed. If not, it usually ends in drama and hardship.

Turns out, God was for the move. Not only that… He provided the funds for the deposit and first month’s rent the moment I needed it! So, in August of 2014 we were on to the next chapter of our Hot Springs journey. Moving closer to the church and school. Johnny still attended the Erwin’s day care (preschool), and their youngest daughter continued to be our nanny! The Erwin’s will always be our family. 


Divine Connection #2

Brookie AKA. Key Key

God knew what He was doing making this woman my sister. She is the very picture of dependability, reliability and unconditional love. I know many decisions I have made have been completely annoying to her, but she always loved me and was there for me regardless of my stupidity. Regardless of how much I may have deserved the mess I got myself in. I am so very grateful she was there to get me out of most of it. God knew I wouldn't have been able to survive big chunks of my life if I didn't have her. And she is by far the best aunt my boys could ever have!!!  

I thank God for her more than she realizes! 


Sara Danielle

Divine Connection #3

How can a cousin be a divine connection you might ask? We were born into the same family… that just happened. NOPE. This woman right here was sent to me by God! She has been my lifeline before I knew how to call on God. Then once we learned how to call on God, we could call on Him together. She knows all of my struggles, and joys. She has been there through absolutely everything. There are so many instances in life I could not have faced without her by my side. Since birth she was my person, and she will always be that person I can call no matter what. We share the same blood, and the same God. We are inseparable. Always have been. Even when we hated each other! 😝


Divine Connection #4

Bethie AKA. Tostada

She may have been my sister’s friend first, but she fast became my sister soon after! At the perfect time, too. I was 13 and was heading for disastrous choices. She was there through all of it. Picking me up when I fell, introducing me to the best fashion trends, coloring my hair in all the colors of my heart’s desire, and talking me out of stupid decisions before I totally wrecked myself. When I did totally wreck myself, she was still there. “SUMMER! UGH! That’s okay, we will figure it out.”

She didn’t have to be there for me. I was just Brooke’s little sister. She didn’t have to give me her heart, her shoulder to cry on, or such a great, unjudging listening ear. She didn’t have to even give me the time of day. But she did. She gave me so much time I will cherish forever. Best talks, best cruises down the street screaming our lungs out to the radio, and the best adventures! I adore my sister from another mister!!! And thank God for her daily!

Word to your mother! 


I was lost and He found me...

For about 10 years or so I felt like I was going along with life in a fog. Cloud of depression over my head. Trying to fill the void with fun times, drinks with friends, the occasional club (which was just blugh), and whatever crush I could find a guy for at that moment to obsess over and fixate on. Then my wonderful cousins, Jed & Sara, stepped in to get my mind and heart right. Jed had been doing prayer counseling locally and was gracious enough to meet with me a few hundred times. Praying for me, getting words from the Lord for me, and correcting the lies I was believing about myself. That was when my relationship with the Lord went to a whole other level I never even knew existed! My entire life was changed. And as I heeded what the Lord was telling me through Jed… my relationship with the Lord exploded. Revelation after revelation. Prophetic word after prophetic word! INSANE AMAZING! So, THANK YOU Sara & Jed for opening your home to me time and time again. Listening to my drama and offering your time to help me get the Lord’s take on it. Loving me and my boys!!!! And for introducing me to the wonder that was Jerome and Anna! Even though I knew them before, but I had no idea the amazing connection with the Lord they had.

Jed & Sara Bicker (my cousins)


Jerome & Anna

Like I said before, I knew Jerome and Anna for a while actually, but I had no idea the depths of their spiritual gifts. Jed and Sara took me to Jerome and Anna’s home one night, and I was put in the “hot seat” and let me tell you… world turned upside down! In the best way possible. I know for a fact I would not have the relationship with the Lord now if it had not been for the multiple times they opened their home to me and were used by the Lord to speak into my life. I can’t even tell you all of the wondrous things I learned about God under their roof. I was healed from pain there, delivered from depression, and so much more! I am so very grateful for Jerome and Anna and their obedience, AMAZING FAITH, and supernatural example. Thank you, thank you, thank you!!! I adore you guys beyond what I could express! And I miss you terribly!! 


Anthony Ferraro

            This guy has been an intricate part of my journey of growing in a closer relationship with the Lord and learning about my destiny. I grew up with Anthony from around 3rd grade on. We were all neighborhood friends with my siblings and some other kids from the neighborhood. Throughout the years, Anthony has come in and out of my life at divinely strategic moments (I am convinced of this).

            One time that sticks out to me was in 2012 when his little sister graduated high school and invited me to the graduation. I was totally honored because I didn’t think that she remembered me. Afterward they invited me back to their house for a small reception. Anthony and I sat outside and he asked to pray for me… well of course I said yes! I never turn down prayer.

            In the middle of praying for me he starts saying “Woah. Woah. You’re calling is HUGE!”. I was like what??? Seriously?? I had no idea at that moment. A few weeks later I went to a 48-hour film project and ended up walking out. I couldn’t believe the projects that were submitted. I was in the car driving home literally crying. The song “Break our hearts for what breaks Yours” came in my heart. I said “Lord, this industry is so messed up. It’s so gross. I can’t stand it. Why is this industry a desire of mine? Why have you called me to this industry? It is awful.”.

            I heard Him clear as day, “ Then do something about it.”. I was shocked… “What? Who is going to listen to me? I’m just this nobody from Little Rock, Arkansas. Half the people of the world forgot this state exists. Most people don’t even know how to pronounce it. Who is going to listen to me?”. He said, “I’m asking YOU to do something about it.”.

            My spirit exploded. My heart exploded. I wept. Anthony’s exclamation of how huge the calling on my life was, started coming into focus. It overwhelmed me, but at the same time I knew it wasn’t about me. I knew it wasn’t all on me. I was to partner with God on this. On what, you ask? Well. It’s going to sound nuts. But, so does most of the things God told people to do in the Bible so. Okay. I’ll tell you. Here goes. Deep breath. I am to partner with God on changing the entertainment industry. How? At that moment, I had no idea. He slowly lays out the plans over the next few years.

            The next time Anthony and I spent time together was a few years later in December of 2014.  We talked about Thomas and the experience of losing him to suicide when I was young. I shared with Anthony that to go from seeing Thomas everyday to never again was a devastating blow to my world. Desperately seeking a means to process the suffocating thoughts of my own mind, I began to write a script for a film to help me cope. I kept a record of seeing him in my dreams, walking in a crowd down the street, or even hearing his voice audibly. Those scenes played out in my mind like a movie over and over throughout the past 14 years. Out of fear, I tucked away the script holding my most vulnerable thoughts for years.

Anthony encouraged me to finish the script and get it out there because it could help others grieving from their losses, or even save those considering taking their life. Well, it just so turned out that the very next month, January of 2015, the man that was once the love of my life, my husband and sons’ father, John Allen Lynch II, took his life.

Again, I failed another love. I couldn’t save him. I didn’t fix his problems. I failed, again. Then as the grieving went on, and as I sought God it hit me. The larger purpose. The bigger picture. The calling on my life.

I knew then that it was time for me to do something! Out of deep grief my faith restored my soul and birthed in me a desire to make a difference. The Lord birthed in me a ministry. 


THIS TOO SHALL PASS FILM

 And so it begins. I started writing. Everyday. All of the scenes from my past script and more and more as the Holy Spirit revealed them to me. Writing and writing and writing. It just flowed like never before. I would be driving down the street and had to pull over and write down the scene as it played out in my mind. Music inspired me the most. Sparked memories from my time with Thomas, and inspired creativity.

            The film is not Thomas’ story. I do not feel that I have the right to tell it. It’s part of my story, but not per say. Not exactly how it played out. It’s a piece of creative writing. I feel that needs to be clarified.

        

    Around 6 years prior to this moment, God divinely connected me to Hollywood Director, Tom Logan, at the International Modeling and Talent Association (IMTA) Convention in NYC. We connected immediately and he then started a routine of flying into Little Rock to teach our students at Excel Academy for Acting – for Film & Television what directors are looking for in working with actors.

(Side note: My mother started Excel Models and Talent ~ a Christian Modeling and Acting School ~ in Little Rock, AR when I was 2 years old {Oct. 1986}. I started acting at 8 years old {1993}  [& went to IMTA in NYC for the first time {summer of 1994}], working at Excel when I was 13 {summer of 1998} by helping mom with paperwork and taking teams of actors and models to meet agents in NY and LA at IMTA, and by 20 years old {summer of 2005}  I was taking teams of actors and models to NY and LA myself. I have been to NYC every summer (and more) since 1994… hence how my deep love for NYC grew. I attending IMTA until God told me to change my focus {December of 2015}, but I’m getting ahead of myself.)

Back to Tom Logan. Since Tom loved me so much 😊 he looked over my script as a favor to me. Probably thinking it was not going to be that great… well, he loved it! Especially the mission behind it! He signed on to be the director of my film, and spent hours and hours (donating his time) going over every aspect of the script to get it film ready. That was an exciting time. That’s the Holy Spirit at work! And the favor of God! Looking back, it is so cool to realize that when God divinely connected us all those years ago He knew this moment was coming.

These moments that were divinely orchestrated for a larger eternal, kingdom purpose makes all of this makes sense. They make the pain and agony of loss and hopelessness not in vain. Knowing that others might be saved by sharing our stories restores the hope that was once lost. 

For more information about the film and how you can be a part of the filming process click  HERE 


NUEVA ESPERANZA

Shooting "Follow" Music Video

Around December of 2015, after leaving Excel, I felt the Lord pushing me to contact Mimi Murguia and tell her about what the Lord was doing. See, a few years earlier Mimi and I had sat down to coffee to discuss IMTA, but we ended up discussing the vision I felt the Lord was calling me to, to make a difference in the entertainment industry through films, and television shows that were entertaining and good quality that still glorified the Lord!

She expressed in an interest in being a part of that and told me to let her know when I started. So that’s what I thought I was doing by calling her. Turned out she told her friend, Gideon Garcia (who I had known from Excel years earlier as well) all that I had shared with her, but at this time I had no idea yet. Mimi’s father is the pastor of the Nueva Esperanza Church in Glenwood, AR and Gideon is the pastor’s right hand man!

The next month, January 2016, I felt the Lord pushing me to go to my brother, Daniel Moody, and write a song for the film. Somewhat of a theme song. I sat down with him and explained to him how it felt loosing Thomas to suicide when I was a teenager. He started with a gorgeous melody and eventually breathtaking lyrics. (It was shake-n-bake and I helped! – younger generations may not get that joke 😊) We had this beautiful song “Follow” and I wasn’t quite sure what to do with it yet.

The next month, February 2016, I felt the Lord pushing me to create a music video for the song, but I couldn’t get a clear vision for it. I had reached out to some talented people I had worked with before, and they got back to me right away and wanted to work on the project with me, but something in my gut was telling me ‘not them’. (uhhum – the Holy Spirit)

Then Gideon Garcia’s birthday announcement popped up on my Facebook so I said “Happy Birthday. What are you up to these days?” or something to that affect. Most people just say, “Oh, just work and school. You?”, but Gideon sends me an email telling me how he was making music videos for the church and school and sent me an example of a video he had recently done. Which was spectacular by the way. WOW. Turns out, Mimi had shared with Gideon God’s calling on my life which is why he felt the need to share. But he had no idea about the song or music video, because I hadn’t known about it yet when I had spoken to Mimi back in December.

I tell Gideon about the song and video and this was totally God that he emailed me all of this. Long story short, Gideon directed the video and got his talented friend Julio Zavala to film and edit it, as well as Oscar Sauceda to do all of the sets and lighting design. Plus, I had my girl lead, the precious and gorgeous and talented Laura Zepeda, but I needed a guy lead to play a very intense role… oh no problem, their friend & Mimi’s brother, Abraham Murguia was perfect and willing. This guy was spot on amazing and exactly what was needed for this role! They were amazingly professional, reliable, and insanely talented. Gideon took scenes from the script I wrote for the film, and brought them to life. My close friend, Victoria Henley (who you will hear more about later) took care of wardorbe and was my right hand woman throughout the entire process. I am overwhelmed by God’s favor and divine connections. 


"FOLLOW" Music Video

Gracias Gideon, Julio, Oscar, Abraham, & Victoria por todo tu trabajo duro. Especialmente mi dulce hija de otra madre, Laura - Dios te usará para las cosas de poder, mi amor!!


Goofy

My daughter from another mother

Ummmmm.

Yummmm. NYC Pizza... nothing like it.

LAURA SOFIA ZEPEDA

How do I even explain this girl? Well, she is a lady now. I met Laura in 2014 at Excel, as I met most people I have known. I was coaching the beginning acting class and Laura got up to read lines with another actor, and my jaw dropped to the floor. Who is this girl, I thought? She MUST go to IMTA. So we met in my office shortly after class and turns out that she was pretty serious about acting and wanted to make a career out of it.

I thought to myself, well that’s good because you could! She signed on to go with me to NYC that summer to attend IMTA. After her ticket was purchased her parents had to move to a different state. If she was to move with them she would miss important classes and meetings in preparation for IMTA and may not be able to attend at all.

I couldn’t imagine her missing this opportunity so I offered she stay with me, help me take care of my boys during the summer in exchange for staying in my hotel room in NYC and her parents agreed! Well, she became a part of our family. I had never had anyone live with me before, and she was the perfect one to try that out on. We may have driven her nuts, but, she was perfect for us! The boys consider her their sister, and I most certainly consider her my daughter.

At IMTA she had many agents interested in her and received a large scholarship to the New York Film Academy (NYFA). Solidifying what I already knew. This girl has talent! But, sadly, after IMTA was over she had to return to her parents and I felt like I lost a daughter. It hit me so hard which was crazy to me. I’ve only known this girl a few months, of course most of those months she lived with me, but still. How did I love her so much already?

Well, we kept in touch over the next year, and I pretty much begged her to come with me to NYC again the following summer {2015}. New York City just isn’t New York City without her anymore, and the boys agree with me. That happened to be my last IMTA trip. That was the summer I was writing my script. She was there with me through the entire process. Laura would read what I wrote a loud to me and it came alive for the first time outside of my own imagination.

The following May of 2016 she came back to Arkansas, traveled on a big smelly bus for 6+ hours to come shoot the “Follow” Music Video for free. Trust me, when it was over, we didn’t want to let her go. I prayed and prayed for the Lord to somehow provide for us to go to NYC summer of 2016 even though I didn’t have a job to pay for it this time. Aiden had received a scholarship to NYFA, and I wanted him to have that opportunity. Plus of course we wanted to go back to NYC, with Laura!

Long story short (again) He provided (again). He made it happen even though we were already believing in Him to meet our every need.  I felt the Lord say, “Your Heavenly Father delights in your delight”. He pointed out to me in the word where He says in Matthew 7:8-11New International Version (NIV)

8 “For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened. “Which of you, if your son asks for bread, will give him a stone? 10 Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake? 11 If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him!”

          He made me see how much I wanted this opportunity for Aiden was just as much as He wanted this opportunity for me. I could go on about Laura for days. This lady is talented & beautiful, yes, but even more precious, thoughtful, caring & loving! I adore her, and thank God for her often! 


Victoria & Robin

Perfectly designed for each other! And for me! Victoria, I had no idea when I first met you how important you would become in my life. When Robin first brought you to Excel I was stand offish at first. But as soon as I got to know the real you I fell in love! So many hours spent developing what I believe was a divine connection between us two. I can’t believe it has only been 4 years, it feels like longer. It makes my heart smile to see you and Robin flourishing in your relationship together. All the hard work the two of you have put into making a successful marriage. I am so proud of you both. A piece of my heart moved to San Antonio when you left. I so look forward to the day we get to spend hours drinking coffee and eating yummy pastries or excellent Italian food in NYC again! Miss You Dear Friend! 

OMG it's the subway


“A CHANGE IS COMING IN SEPTEMBER”

            That is what I felt the Lord tell me after John passed. I knew something was going to happen in September {2015}, I just didn’t know what. I started to make changes to Excel’s programs thinking that might be what. Nope. Not that. Then September comes. One night I am lying in bed and as I’m drifting off to sleep the Lord clearly tells me, “Excel is not your source, I am your source. Excel is not your vision. It is your mother’s vision.”. He then made it clear to me that I was to leave Excel in the coming December {2015}.

            This was a huge deal. I had worked for my mother’s company my entire life. To leave would feel like I was abandoning her. Well that was until I heard the Lord say it was time for me to leave. One minute before He released me of my duties at Excel no one could have convinced me to leave. But at that moment I knew. In December, my life was going to change. 


DECEMBER

            When December came, God provided like He promised. He not only told me to leave the place I had worked much of my life, but He also told me not to get another job. But to focus on Him, the film and what was soon to become a full-on ministry. Throughout this journey of not having a steady stream of income (that I know where it is coming from), I see why He told me not to get another job.

            He wanted me to build a stronger relationship with Him, and He knew… the way I work… I’m all in. So, it is hard to manage work, home and Him. He wanted my attention full time, and He provided so that I could oblige. I needed that time to get ready for what He had for me to do.

            He also wanted me to be a full-time mom. I worked so much I was gone a lot! Way too much, and I was sacrificing my relationship with my children because of it. That’s totally normal as a single mom, but because I was all they had… they needed more of me. And I was happy to make that change. I have been given so much joy and fulfillment through my sweet boys! And I am reaping the rewards of the quality time sown.

            Plus, He knew I needed to HAVE TO fully rely on Him for EVERYTHING to realize how much I do actually need Him on a daily basis; for much more than just funds. I needed a JOLT. A reality check. I’m quick to figure it out on my own. I am used to automatically doing whatever needs to be done to fix problems. Even to the detriment of our relationship. For Him to be able to trust me with such a large vision… He had to JOLT me out of that life and into a life of 100% reliance and dependence on Him for EVERYTHING. 


Unexpected Blessings

Jerome and Anna: $450 sent to me from Connecticut the first time I questioned myself about hearing the Lord and not working: “The Lord wants you to know that you are on the right path.”

MeLisa: One Sunday I come to church, out of money, “Can I get a job now, Lord?” MeLisa comes up to me after church with a check “You can’t say no, and you can’t not take it because the Lord told me to give you this!”

Bananas: One day I’m sitting on my couch running low on food with no money to get more. I said, “Lord, I just want a banana.” Knock Knock Knock. My neighbor is at my door, “ I just thought you might want these bananas.” 😲 NO Joke!

Andrea: I had hit a low point. Even after all the times the Lord provided for me. I was sitting in my apartment and crying wondering how much longer I was to endure this. (comical) My neighbor, Andrea, brought me water (which at that point was greatly needed) cash, a gift card to Walmart and precious prayer time that was hugely appreciated and needed. She has prayed for me many times, and each times was instrumental in my walk with the Lord!

Kern: So, I’m late on my rent by two months. I am stressing. Thinking Kern is thinking I’d better get a job and pay him what I owe him. I finally get my income tax refund in and its just enough to pay the past two months rent (which was a blessing but I HATE being late!!!) I had some people tell me “God doesn’t pay His bills late, so you clearly aren’t hearing from the Lord on not working.” So that got in my head. I went to the bank to pull out the cash to pay Kern, and some other things had gone through my account in large portions that didn’t have my permission to be processed and it stressed me out even more. I pull up to my apartment and Kern is there working on another unit. I’m thinking “Great. Here we go. He’s going to tell me how irresponsible this is and how I better get a job and not be late again.” So I get out of the car, give him the cash and tell him I’m sorry for being late and then (stupidly) go into complaining about the issues with my accounts. Does he rebuke me? Does he lecture me about being late or irresponsible like I assumed? NOPE. He encourages me. Uplifts me. And then asks me who is paying for my kids tuition at the school? “Well, someone anonymously sponsored Aiden, (ummm hello blessing I forgot about), but I am trying to pay for Johnny’s tuition but I’m way behind and owe a lot!” So he then proceeds to tell me about how proud he is of me choosing to bring my boys to this great school, putting them in a safe environment and seeking the Lord for our lives and that he is going to go pay off Johnny’s tuition… all that I owe and the rest of the year! Paid. WOW!

“Huneds”: I have found $100 dollar bills many times. In my Bible. In my house. In my car. Just insane.

Food, food and food galore: I have been given so much food… beyond what the boys and I could eat. I have had more joy being able to distribute that food to my parents (who fed me the majority of my life) friends and neighbors, than I could have ever thought possible.


Amber Erdley - My best friend & Ministry Partner

I know for a fact this woman was hand delivered to me from God Himself. Even though when we first met over 10 years ago, and were both in failing first marriages… not really living for God at the time, He knew our future together and that gives me a peace like no other. He divinely orchestrated our relationship and I could not thank Him enough for the unexplainable piece of the puzzle she is in my life.

            I am certain that our journeys are only now just beginning. We are going to move mountains together. We are going to save lives together for the Kingdom of Heaven! We are going to change the world together! It sets my heart and spirit on fire to think of all God is going to do through us as a team and as individuals holding each other up throughout it all. 


Tom Geppert

How do I even explain Tom? Well, I was sitting in the coffee shop by my house one day and this guy is in there talking about the Glory of God to some random people and to everything he said my spirit said YES! And I thought to myself… I want him to come talk to me. Low and behold… he did. Shocker. The same day we meet for the first time he prayers for me and delivers me from an evil spirit. I felt the sucker leave my body. It was like my back was covered in Icy Hot or Bio-freeze all of a sudden… he commands it to leave and BOOM all in the same second the tingling was GONE. Such an amazing feeling.

 

            Then he introduced me to his wife and when she prayed for me… I felt a genuine concern for me and my boys from a person I just met. That was something I had never experienced before. They have both been there for me as mentors and shared many words from the Lord for me that have ended up saving my life! As well as oodles and oodles of food and prayer! 


Linda Ballard

Linda has been a member of my church for years, but we met when I went out of my comfort zone and did a small bible study with a group of people from our church. Man am I glad I did, because it helped more than my prayer life… it helped me connect with people in my church I otherwise might not have connected with. Like Linda for instance. We got to talking and I just loved this woman.

            Then one day I felt the Lord okay me reaching out on Facebook for someone who was good at fundraising (because I was not). Linda reached out. She had amazing ideas about what to do share my story and message with people. However, as He often does, the Lord took us in a different direction. She did so much more than help me with fundraising. She mentored me and has blessed me with prayer and wise counsel so many times.

            She introduced me to the women at Stonecroft Morning Connection and hooked me up with speaking for their group about what God has called me to do! Each time I went God set up a diving connection! I have yet to explore what all will fully accomplish on this journey… there have been that many! 


My Sweet, Funny, Intelligent Brother

Daniel Moody

So, when I left Excel I lost the company vehicle I was driving. Therefore, I had no vehicle. God provided through friends for about a year who, without me asking, offered their extra vehicles for me to use while I needed them. Thank you, Tiffany Bruce and Holly & Julian Jones, for your kindness and generosity!!! One day I get a phone call from my brother, Daniel, and he asks me if I want his vehicle! FOR FREE! WHAT? Why yes, Daniel. Yes I do! So Daniel not only donated his vehicle to Far More Productions, but he also put up the money for me to get car insurance set up, and the title transferred!  Amazing. Huge blessing! Thank you so very much Daniel!! 

Meet TRABAJO


OAKS OF RIGHTEOUSNESS

Far More Productions Prophecy

          Not long after meeting Tom Geppert he called me with a word. He was walking in his backyard and heard the Lord tell him to look down. He saw a perfect acorn and the Lord instructed him to pick it up and bring it to me with this word.

            “Like this acorn is Far More Productions. When planted and nurtured Far More Productions will grow into a MIGHTY OAK hovering over the community that will provide shelter, comfort, and the love of Christ for God’s children.”

            I cherished that word in privacy for a year. I placed the acorn in a protective box out of reach from children. 😊 Around a year later, my mother and ministry partner joined me in praying circles around the future Far More Productions building. One day my mother was walking and praying by herself. She was done and ready to go back to her car when the Lord told her to go back to the front door. Then He told her to look down, and there lay 7 little acorns. He informed her to gather them all and gave her the exact same word that Tom had given me a year earlier! The best part is my mother did not know the word Tom had given me the year before! 

           While watching Bill Johnson,  from Bethel Church in Redding, CA, one Sunday morning with my mother, he talked about Isaiah 61. For us to become Oaks of Righteousness is the goal of the Lord, to heal the broken people of the world. Our discupleship program is called Oaks of Righteousness !

 And provide for those who grieve in Zion – to bestow on them a crown of beauty, instead of ashes, the oil of joy, instead of mourning, and a garment of praise, instead of a spirit of despair. They will be called oaks of righteousness, a planting of the Lord for the display of His splendor.  -Isaiah 61:3